Tuesday, June 05, 2012

5. When Fights Happen...Make Cookies

When I first read out loud this post on "16 Lessons Learned in Marriage," my daughter encouraged me to elaborate on each one, especially since they really truly authentically are lessons I have indeed actually really learned in the years that I've been happily hitched to my hubby.

I thought about it, but then I decided that I'd have 16 more ready-made subjects to blog about later on down the road. Perfect, right? I thought you'd agree.

5. When fights happen...make cookies.

There have been times in our marriage when we've had a disagreement of sorts. Nothing serious. Nothing out of the ordinary. Just a mild skirmish that ends...well, that ends in the proverbial "Mexican Standoff."

Early in our marriage, Stuart and I would have one of these moments. I would end up doing what we later dubbed as a "monologue," and he would go quiet...and then we'd both stay silent for hours. No kidding. And then -- wait for it...I'm not joking you -- he'd fall asleep.

I mean, what better way to end a feud than to close your eyes and start to snore?

Not much shows loving, caring, understanding, and willingness to work things out like the sound of "Zzzzs" reverberating from our easy chair.


Usually, I'd end up a bit more perturbed than before.

(Go figure.)

But then something would happen.

I'd get this incredible urge to go into the kitchen and clean it up. Do all the dishes. Scour the table and counters. And then...make cookies.

It's like the idea of sharing something soft, warm, and sweet would melt the frustrations mounting between us.

And it worked.

(Go figure.)  

Sometimes -- though I'm sure more rarely in other households -- we have little tiffs with our kids, as well. Little disagreements that blow out of proportion, causing us to second-guess any funds we're putting towards vacation plans and instead put that money into a houseboat fund that would allow us as parents to stay -- childless -- offshore just for a decade year month few days for the sake of our sanity.

Just sometimes, mind you.

So a funny thing happened this morning....a mere few hours after a slightly large row happened between said children and myself....

I found myself baking...banana bread.

I woke up remembering the frustrations I'd had at them last night and suddenly had the urge to make something warm, sweet, and yummy.

And it worked. A lot of laughter was heard around the table as we devoured the freshly baked goodness.

So remember, when you fight -- and you know you will at some point -- go bake something yummy. It'll be worth the effort. I promise!

No comments: