Reflective Thoughts

I turn a bit reflective today. Not sure why...except there have been a few reminders of a happening from nearly 5 years ago that have me remembering. Is it perhaps because it's July 11th that I'm thinking about September 11th?

September 11th is my hubby's birthday. It's the day we celebrate him and his birth and the joy it's been to be a part of his life. We have cake and open presents and think of all sorts of ways to have fun with him.

It's also a day of national mourning.

This year marks the 5th year since those horrific events that shook our nation to its very foundations...brought our country -- and the world -- to its knees. Funny how quickly -- in our busy day-to-day lives -- we forget though. We move on. I'm sure the 1,000s who lost loved ones don't forget.

Several movies recounting the horrors that day have been released since that date. One was even nominated for an Emmy this year. I watched the documentary called 9/11 not long after the actual event. But I cannot seem to bring myself to watch anything else since.

Is it because I don't want to remember the shock of first hearing on the radio the news of a plane hitting the towers? (I thought it was only a little twin-engine Cessna off its flight path.) Is it because I can't bring myself to think about the moment my heart stopped as I watched the second plane hit the twin towers? (I was phoning my husband to tell him the news. He said the sound of my voice and the moment of shocked silence that followed made him catch his breath.) Or perhaps it's not wanting to recall the bark of my voice when I ordered our nearly 4-year-old daughter back up to her room to protect her from seeing the towers crumbled into dust? (I collapsed on the floor and prayed for all those people who didn't make it out.)

But I realize I need to remember. I need to mourn with those who lost loved ones and friends. I need to think that such a thing could happen again if our country does not remain on guard. I need to remember that I must tell my family how much I love them ALL the time and quickly heal rifts that come between us. Some of the families of the victims wish they could do just that: Go back to that one moment when they could have said "goodbye" or "I love you."

On New Year's Eve 2001, we sat together as a family and thanked God for different happenings in 2001. Edward joined our family in February. We'd been able to see Granny and Grampy from England in May. (They'd even been able to visit the World Trade Center.) Emily turned 4 years old. We'd gone to visit Niagara Falls. Then the mood turned somber, and we prayed for the families of all those who died on September 11th.

"And thank you, Jesus, for all those people who made it out of the buildings before they fell down," prayed our 4-year-old.

What an even more important reminder to us. The silver lining in a very dark cloud.