Soul, It Is...Well

Six and a half years ago, in August 2016, I received some of the most devastating personal news of my life: I had breast cancer.

It was a surreal moment. My head spun and my heart raced. I didn't know what to say to the doctor on the other end of the phone call. I felt wordless.

But God, as He always does, put the exact right person in that position at exactly the right moment. The doctor who called wasn't the surgeon I'd been seeing. He was just the one on duty that day. He didn't know me, but he did understand cancer since he'd already had it, as well. He gave me space to process the news and then explained the type of cancer I had and the prognosis, which he noted was very good. If I had to have cancer, it was a "good" one to have, he said. He wasn't a fortune teller, psychic, or visionary -- just someone who understood from experience and his job.

The next month and a half was filled with appointments and plans. My surgery was scheduled for a few days after my birthday in mid-October.

I won't lie and say I wasn't nervous. But God placed the first verse and refrain from the old hymn, "It Is Well with My Soul," in my head and that helped me through that time. He reminded me of the words and the story behind them. And, because of that, I had a tremendous peace.

From Wikipedia: The hymn was written by Horatio Spafford after many traumatic events in his life. 

The first two were the death of his four-year-old son and the Great Chicago Fire of 1871, which ruined him financially (he had been a successful lawyer and had invested significantly in property in the area of Chicago that was extensively damaged by the great fire). His business interests were further hit by the economic downturn of 1873, at which time he had planned to travel to England with his family on the Ville du Havre for D. L. Moody's upcoming evangelistic campaigns. 

In a late change of plan, he sent the family ahead while he was delayed on business concerning zoning problems following the Great Chicago Fire. While crossing the Atlantic Ocean, the ship sank rapidly after a collision with a sea vessel, the Loch Line, and all four of Horatio's daughters died. His wife Anna survived and sent him the now famous telegram, "Saved alone …" 

Shortly afterwards, as Horatio traveled to meet his grieving wife, he was inspired to write these words as his ship passed near where his daughters had died.

When peace like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to know
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Refrain
It is well, (it is well),
With my soul, (with my soul)
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

If a man who had lost so much could say that, I, with curable cancer, could repeat the same words. 

Praise God!

Goodbye, Old Friend

Written soon after he died nearly five years ago...shared now because we miss him...

And with a final wag, we bid goodbye to our precious Buster Brown, our first family pooch of nearly 16 years.

I am reminded of the story told through Marley and Me. The author, being a journalist, chronicled his dog's life through a column he wrote for the newspaper.

A dog's life.

Many live fewer years than our sweet dog. We were blessed. We know that and accept that gift with a huge amount of gratitude.

Often, after the loss of a pet, my husband expresses his sadness by saying he doesn't want any more pets...he wished he didn't have to feel such pain. But I always counter him with the fact that if we didn't have the pet we wouldn't have had the joy they brought.

Yes, it's hard. VERY hard. Sometimes it feels as if our hearts might break. But it's also beautiful.

A sweet friend reminded me that Buster lived "a long, loved life."

And he did. Always smiling. Always happy. Always grateful. (He wouldn't start eating without us patting him and saying, "You're welcome!")

I like to remember him that way.

Loved for a long time.