Happy New Year!!

Happiest of Happy New Years! We are SO glad that it's 2017!

To say that 2016 was not our family's favorite-most year does not adequately cover it. But to say that God carried us and strengthened us and kept us going through it is an absolute blessing and truth!

Between Emily's extended illness and emergency appendectomy and my breast cancer and Stuart starting back to college and still traveling...and the boys being hungry ALL the time...and medical bills that are drowning us...

But through it all, God was there...and still is. We know that He who controls the universe hasn't forgotten us.

A recap in photos of 2016...and see? We were even smiling.



2016: Year in Pictures

Saturday Sweethearts

Is it possible that these two are as big as they are? 

We feel so blessed by their close friendship, despite the 7.5 year age gap. It's going to be really hard on Ethan when Edward goes off to college one day. 

Until then, we'll enjoy these moments...

To Like or Not to Like

In a world that's saturated by social media, friendship is cheap.

On Facebook and Twitter, we "collect" friends and followers, even though we may never really speak to or connect with said friends and followers. We just "like" or repost photos and stories and statuses. Or retweet things we think are interesting. Sometimes we post photos in the hopes that they will draw a lot of attention and get lots of "likes" and/or comments. Then we'll feel liked, right?

But is there any real connection?

It's really just a popularity contest. We can choose the "friend of the day" like a person chooses a flavor of ice cream. We also can judge people by what they post. Sometimes, posts even cause feelings of inadequacy and jealousy, most of us forgetting that we can choose to do some of the same things we see or read about -- watch the same movies, read the same books, visit the same restaurants and cafes, save to travel to the same places, be the same patient/loving mother we think our friends are.

It just takes more effort (and money) for some.

Do you remember as a child being in a group of friends and seeing the "odd" girl hanging out on the fringe? Sometimes she was reading a book. Sometimes she was playing by herself. Sometimes she was standing, longing to be included. Do you remember feeling sad for her but hoping that someone else would invite her to join in? Do you remember when you became that "odd" girl and suddenly you understood just how lonely it felt to be on the outside edge of the circle? It made you promise yourself that if you ever made it back into the circle that you would always include any girls on the fringe.

What causes people to pick and choose who they like and don't like? Why do we separate into groups, causing others to feel on the outer edge? It takes effort to include everyone. It takes thought.

Thought.

Sure, we're only human. We can't do everything perfectly, and sometimes we're going to forget to show the kindnesses that we've been shown. But when we do think of others -- include others -- we're doing something different...and we're showing God's love. Two good things.

We can't really choose to like or not like someone. Well, we can...but should we? In a world filled with loneliness and hopelessness, let's try harder to be a friend to everyone.

It'll be worth the effort.

Saturday Sweethearts

Sometimes in life an adventure is necessary in order to fill the hearts of our children. Today was one of those days. We traveled 200 miles (round trip) to visit a small mall north of Harrisburg and meet some awesome online friends for the first time IRL (for the non-texters out there, that's "in real life").

And it was totally worth it!

Friend or Foe...or Somewhere in Between - Part 3

"Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other gold."

We used to sing that when I was a little girl in the Brownies. We would sit in a circle and cross our arms to hold hands with the girls next to us. My mom was one of the leaders, volunteering in the hopes that I would make friends and enjoy Girl Scouts as much as my sisters did. I didn't. And I didn't.

Not because I didn't try. I think it just wasn't meant to be. We moved soon afterwards.

The problem with the above song is that not all "old friends" want to remain friends. People today are temporal. We want to be friends with those who are tangible...right there in our sight.

We've moved from two different churches over the past few decades. We spent 18 years at the one and 12 at the next...and in both cases the people we thought were our close friends dropped us, forgetting us like we never existed.

It's not that they were trying to be mean. We just weren't there anymore. So, out of sight, out of mind...and heart.

It makes a person a little heartsick to think that we meant that much to them.

And it's interesting, given the amount of free social media options out there, that our friendships couldn't keep going. We have email, Facebook, Twitter, Skype, Yahoo! Instant Messenger...etc.

But it takes work to stay in touch. Not everyone has that strength or the stamina. And sometimes we're so busy with our own lives that we forget. (I'm just as guilty as the next person for that.)

Where's that leave me and my little Brownie song?

Pretty much singing alone with my arms crossed and no one's hands to hold.

Maybe it's time to get off the social apps and start again...in person? Find new friends, who like me, need a little silver.

Maybe it will be a silver lining in the clouds.

But how does one go about finding new friends as an adult?  Any ideas or suggestions?

To be continued...

Freedom of What?

The thing about freedom of speech is that it has to go both ways. You cannot tell one side to agree...or shut-up. Sort of goes contrary to the whole meaning of freedom, right?

So I don't agree with the lifestyle choice of the lesbian and homosexual community. (Earth-shattering, I know.)  I don't appreciate them trying to redefine marriage, and I most especially despise their perception of my opinion as being "hateful" to them.

I disagree, but that does NOT mean I hate them.

We've gotten away from the concept of separating beliefs from the actual person.  I use the Bible as the basis for my values and beliefs. I may say that in public or in private to friends or acquaintances. But I never shove it down their throats. That's part of the freedom. To choose to believe or not to believe.

When people (especially those of public-figure stature) actually tweet about their desire for people who eat at certain restaurants (owned by people who support my view of traditional marriage) to get cancer and die....

WOW!

Really?!?

And what's even sadder is that that's okay for them. If someone from the other side says that? It's considered a threat and horrific (which it is from either side).

Hmm...

Civilization can only exist where its citizens respect and honor each other -- on both sides of any subject.

It's agreeing to disagree...and loving each other despite the differences.  Since when did we become such an intolerant people?

It's a freedom to say something and a freedom to listen. In the case of stuff I don't agree with, I just choose not to listen. But the difference is I never tweet about it...or wish ill on someone who believes the opposite of me.

Sigh.

As another blogger noted: Choosing to boycott a fastfood restaurant chain because you don't agree with the owner's opinions and beliefs...such a first world problem.

How indulged are we?

Plenty of companies openly support the lesbian and homosexual communities.  You don't hear the rest of us calling on the fires of Hell to destroy them, right?

Know that even if you support those causes -- or any others I might not agree with -- I still love you. And because of that, I can agree to disagree with you.  That's TRUE freedom of speech.

Friend or Foe...or Somewhere in Between - Part 2

So I started on this subject a few weeks ago in this post.

Friendship has always lent itself to some pretty deep pondering...about oneself and about others...at least in my life. Sometimes it's hard to figure out why some people have so many and others seem to have none.

We have mixed feelings about the telephone in our house.

Sometimes we are excited by its ring...and sometimes we are angered...and sometimes it doesn't ring at all.

We love for the phone to ring when its someone we love -- or, for me, when it's a source I've been trying to get in touch with for an article.

We're mad when it's telephone solicitation...or a campaign call...or a wrong number with someone asking for the same people...again.

It's a bit perplexing at times when it's silent, and we realize that the phone doesn't ring for us very often.

My mom has been encouraging us to get to know people and make new friends. She gets very worried about the kids seeming to not have any friends. She doesn't see the effort I've put into helping them find some and how that effort falls flat. If it happens enough times, people finally give up.  I mean, why is the onus always on us to make friends? Why aren't other kids seeking out our kids for playdates?

Phone numbers are exchanged, but no one calls -- on either side.

Sometimes we're told it would be different if our kids went to school.

Hmm... I agree that they would be exposed to more kids, thereby the possibility for friendship goes up, but that doesn't guarantee friends. It seems that people need to be "desirable" to draw friends. I'm guessing we're not.

The kids go to activities -- at church and in our community. We ask the parents/kids to meet up. We get lots of smiles and lots of "sounds great"s. But still the phone never rings...the emails never come, even in response to our calls/emails.

But it's a different world these days -- a world filled with activities of all sorts and electronics of even more sorts. People are busy, busy, busy.  Kids don't play outside anymore.

At least not where we live.

We know. We've "trolled" the neighborhood, looking for someone to meet and get to know and play with. And when kids do play outside, they're not interested in meeting new kids to add to their group of peers. 

No one encourages it either.

We get polite smiles from the adults and wide-eyed stares from the kids. And one look at my kids as we continue to walk, and I know and feel their disappointment.

My point is this:  Friendship is a two-way street. Both sides need to be seeking and working at it for it to work. When just because one side tries and nothing comes of it doesn't mean that there's something wrong with them or they aren't trying hard enough. It becomes easy to think that.

Ah, well.  Enough pondering -- and complaining. We'll keep on trying...or perhaps it's time to move?

At least we'd get a new phone number.

To be continued...

Friday Funnies

In continuing the theme I posted about earlier in the week on making friends, I saw a post that included this clip from Seinfeld. It won't let me embed it, so you'll have to click on the link to see this hilarious take on how friendship forms. I think he's on to something...

Enjoy, and have a really fun (and silly) Friday!

Friend or Foe...or Somewhere in Between? - Part 1

It's a funny thing with kids and friends.

I'm not sure if it's the area in which we live or yet another sign of the times...but our kids can't seem to find friends.

They have lots of acquaintances -- and friends-on-the-surface -- but honest-to-goodness BFFs seem scarce these days. At least in our little microcosm.

When I was a kid we moved a lot...and by a lot, I mean: A LOT.  Every so many years we were uprooted and moving to a new neighborhood, where for the most part we had to find our own kind to hang with. My mom never set up "play dates" or walked us door-to-door.

We went to school...met people on the bus...were involved in clubs...or even walked ourselves around the neighborhood knocking on doors and asking if there were any kids on the premises who might be available to play with us. I guess we knew no shame?

I can't say it was my favorite thing to do, and I was awfully glad to have a big sister to walk around with, especially since she did most of the talking. Of course, she ended up with most of the friends, too. Go figure.

Over the years, we met a few nice people...a few mean people...a few people who started off nice and ended up mean...and a few people that fluctuated between the two, veering mostly towards nice.  It was an interesting way to grow up.

My point has nothing to do with a comparison of my kidhood versus the kidhood my own sweeties are experiencing. My point is merely about friends.  There's no set formula for how it happens. (I truly wish there was.) In my own experience, you're just nice to somebody similar in age and hope that they'll be nice back.

And being nice might mean chatting with them, getting together with them, praying for them, etc.  I remind them that friendship is like a flower, in that sometimes it takes time to blossom and bloom.

So this is what we teach our kids...it just hasn't produced any "fruit" yet.

To be continued....

And All God's People...

Sometimes I feel like I could be the subject of Johnny Cash's song, "I've Been Everywhere."

"I've been everywhere, man.
I've been everywhere, man.
Crossed the desert's bare, man.
I've breathed the mountain air, man.
Of travel I've had my share, man.
I've been everywhere."

Okay. He's been to way more places than I have...but let me recount my life's journey....

Born in Silver Spring, Md., and then moved to Greensburg, Pa.; Cape St. Clair, Md.; Annapolis, Md.; Folsom, Ca. (two moves); Douglassville, Pa. (two moves), Robeson Towship, Pa. (two moves), Swindon, England; Brighton, England (two moves); California, Pa.; Lancaster, Pa.; Elverson, Pa.; Honesdale, Pa.; Reading, Pa. (two moves); and finally Wyomissing, Pa.

Phew.

Nineteen moves (not including the back and forth to college).  And that's not nearly as many as my parents, though it's certainly not a competition.

I began remembering all of my former locations during a song we were singing in church on Sunday.

"Let the 'Amen!' sound from His people again...."

And it struck me.

I can't wait to get to Heaven to be with ALL the people I've ever worshipped with over my lifetime. It is going to be, in the words of Barney Stinson, "Legend -- wait for it -- dary!"  And that's putting it lightly.

Sometimes people get sad when God moves people out of a particular church. We don't understand God's reasons. We feel hurt and angry. We don't want to talk to them anymore. I know. Remember, I've moved around a lot in my lifetime. Goodbyes are never easy.

But what we lose sight of in our "human earthliness" is the fact that if we're in Christ we aren't ever saying goodbye. Ever.

One day, we will worship together again in the greatest worship hall ever created with the greatest worship leaders and God right there, visible and sitting on His throne. Imagine the acoustics!

Got chills?

I sure do!

So to those we left for whatever reason God had...in Annapolis EP church; Folsom's Community Bible Church; Elverson's Community Evangelical Free Church; Swindon's Freshbrook Evangelical Church; and Cumru Township's Reading Evangelical Free Church (now Crossway Church):  We never say goodbye because we can't. We will sing together again! And it will be forever in Christ.

I can't wait to hear All God's People say: AMEN!!

*   *   *   *   *

What a sound that will be.  Will you join me?



Praise To The Lord The Almighty

Praise to the Lord, the Almighty
The King of creation
O my soul, praise Him
For He is thy health and salvation
All ye who hear, now to His temple draw near
Join me in glad adoration

Praise to the Lord
Who o'er all things so wonderfully reigneth
Shelters thee under His wings
Yea, so gladly sustaineth
Hast thou not seen how thy glories e'er have been
Granted in what He ordaineth

Praise to the Lord, O let all that is in me adore Him
All that hath life and breath
Come now with praises before Him
Let the 'amen' sound from His people again
Gladly for aye we adore Him.

Farm Show Fun, Friends, and Photos

And a good time was had by all! 

Great time with awesome friends and yummy food! And the weather stayed mild! A rare occurrence during Farm Show Week. *wink-grin*

Facing the Truth

I've come to the conclusion after spending the past 3+ years on Facebook that to some "friends" I am a nobody...or at least nobody who is that important.

It's okay. It's okay.

I'm not looking for pity -- not in the slightest. I can leave that social network at any time...right?  Or, at the very least, go to "Facebook-users Anonymous." *wink-grin*

Let me explain.

I'm not sure of actual Facebook etiquette -- though I'm tempted to write a manual on the topic -- but if you're "friended" by people, especially people you thought were actual real-life friends, you should be important to them on there, right? What I mean by that is that if you comment on their posts or "like" something they've posted or leave them messages or tell them you'll pray for them, etc., they'll respond to you and maybe even reciprocate in kind (understandably, not all the time, of course). Or if they don't respond to you directly on a particular post they won't respond to anyone else who commented either.

WRONG.

Apparently, it's okay to thank some of the people who offer friendship and kind words to you...and ignore the rest.

Who knew?

Another part of the etiquette that I've come to learn is that people can comment TO someone who has commented on someone else's post, regardless of whether or not they've ever (and I mean EVER) communicated with the original poster directly. It's all a part of that "six degrees of separation," I guess.

Go figure.

I would have thought that they'd comment to the original poster and then add an "aside" to the commenter of choice. Guess I thought wrong again.

And yet another fact that I've learned concerning the Facebook "rules of friendship" is that people can publicly message one another bragging about the wonderful time they had together and how they can't wait to do it again and how they're the best-est friends they've ever known...and their kids will grow up and continue the family friendship for all eternity......  Okay, slight exaggeration on the "best-est friends" part since you know that they'll post that again on another person's wall before too long.

Well, I'll be.

It doesn't matter that their 180+ other friends have just read that and thought that they were their "best-est ever" friends and that they would just love to get together with them but they've been "far too busy to do that...but soon," etc. Hmm...

The fact is online friendship is still friendship. People go online to continue their friendships with others in a different way...another facet, if you will. It matters what you post and how you post and if you post. People are watching and reading and feeling -- even online.

Being rude online isn't any more acceptable than being rude in person. It's just easier.

So, Facebook friends, if you see that you've disappeared from my list, you'll understand why. Nothing personal..... 

Friendship is friendship (caring, loving, praying for each other) -- online and offline.  I'd rather spend my time -- both on and offline -- and energy -- both on and offline -- with people who truly care for me both on and offline.

Missing Monday Musings...

So here we are...the first official full day of Spring. Yippee!  It can only get warmer and sunnier from here, right? Well, we can hope. Snow and sleet are predicted for Wednesday...

I haven't done a Monday Musings post for some time now, and I think I'm a bit rusty. So much has happened that I haven't chronicled that I'm not sure I could cover it all without writing an entire volume of our family history.

So I'll just start with this past Saturday...and fill in later with posts about the "history" and memorable events of the past year.

Saturday.

A dear friend of ours from England brought her daughters to New York City for a shopping weekend. You know, one of those expedia.com deals you can buy? It was her youngest daughter's 13th birthday, and she thought it would be a wonderful treat for her.

The best treat was for us to join them for the afternoon on Saturday...to visit, to shop, to look around, and just enjoy each other.

It was fabulous!!

(Sarah and Stuart and I met after I moved to England in 1988. It'd been about 10 years since we'd seen each other.)

Since it was Ethan's first trip to NYC, it was also a special family time for us.

We took the PATH train from Hoboken and then the subway up to 58th to go to the best-est toystore in the world: FAO Schwarz. From there, we took the subway back to 34th to meet Sarah and her daughters at Macy's. After a fun time of eating, drinking (soda), and visiting, we hit the streets to go to Times Square and then the Rockefeller Center. It was a long day for all concerned, but a fun day.

Such a treat...such a memory!

I'll let the pictures tell the rest of the story: